All I know

All I know is I wanted to strangle her. Pure hatred flowed through my veins like blood, and there was nothing I could do to stop. I tried to remind myself that it wasn’t Christian to hate someone, but all I could think of was how she had betrayed me, how she had hurt me. If it were me, I would have chosen the friendship over the guy, but that was just me.

And there she was in the car, sitting next to me like nothing mattered. It rolled off her tongue like it didn’t matter, as if she were telling me she had a dentist appointment later that day she needed me to take her to. She had become so nonchalant lately about everything. Almost like nothing she said or did mattered. I truly wanted to strangle her until the life left her body, but I knew I couldn’t because I knew how much it would hurt him…

Elena had been my best friend since 8th grade, but lately we had been fighting a lot and weren’t as close as we once were. It felt as though we were getting to the end, but neither one of us wanted to admit it. We had gone through so much to get here, why give up now? But that day ended it all. I lost any respect I had for her when I found out she was sleeping with Robert, the love of my life.

We had broken up a few months prior, but it still felt like we were together. Sometimes we would hang out and… Well it was complicated to say the least. But we never really got back together after the fight. It was a cold February morning, three days before Valentines day when it all came to a screeching halt. We were planning what to do for our first Valentines day together, and me being the hopeless romantic wanted to do the traditional dinner and dancing, but Robert was thinking something slightly more, well personal, is the best way to put it.

Little did I know how personal. He wanted to drive up the coast and visit this little inn where we could stay the night and drive back down the next morning. Well I gave in and said yes to his plans, only to regret it a few days later. We were driving in his beat up old mustang with the top down when his phone rang. He answered it only to hang up seconds later. Then my phone rang. He told me to not answer it, but me being the pain I am decided to answer it. I wish I never had. On the other line was Elena, and that conversation turned out to be the most painful experience in my life…

“Hey Elena, what’s up?” I said. “I have something to tell you,” Elena said. “Spill it,” I replied. “I’m in love with Robert,” she said.

I hung up the phone, told Robert to pull over, got out of the car, and started to walk. How could she, I thought? How dare she actually have feelings for the one person who accepted me as is? Robert ran after me, and I started to cry when he wrapped his arms around me. He asked what was wrong, so I told him. He said he knew, that’s why he told me not to answer the phone. That’s when it all started…

I asked him how long he had known and he said a few days. She had come over and told him after I left three days earlier from planning our getaway. I asked him if he had done anything with her or had led her on in any way. He said she kissed him, but he didn’t return. I knew then I needed to break up with him. I couldn’t choose between my best friend and a guy. It just couldn’t be. Not knowing what I knew.

So I told Robert I was breaking up with him, and we began to fight. He thought we could still be together, just not be so open about it around Elena, but I knew it would never work. He didn’t know her like I knew her, at least I thought so. I asked him to drive me home, so we got back in the car and drove home in silence. He dropped me by the curb and said not to call him, ever. I tried to apologize, but he said he couldn’t be just friends with someone he was so in love with.

I called Elena and told her we needed to talk. I went over to her house and began to yell and scream and cry. I was so hurt that she made me break up with him. You see we had made a pact that a guy would never come between us, but I never thought it would get to this point. She KNEW how in love with Robert I was, and knew all that I had been through to be with him. And she wanted me to throw it all away for a friendship that went down the drain only a few months later.

Soon after we broke up, Robert called to find out how I was. I told him I was seeing someone and that I really didn’t want to talk to him because of the new guy. From what everyone has told me, that was the night he and Elena started sleeping together. Elena and I began to drift apart, spending less and less time together. I know now why that is, but then I didn’t understand. I blamed it on we were both working really hard and going to school, so we just didn’t have the time.

Out of the blue, Elena called me about six months after Robert and I broke up, asking me to give her a ride home from work. She said her car was in the shop and she needed to get home, so I agreed to give her a lift. I showed up at her work and picked her up. I knew something was up when she said that she had something to tell me.

“Robert and I have been sleeping together for a couple of months, and I thought you should know.” Elena said.

I put the car in park, told her to get out, and drove off. I just didn’t care anymore. I had tried so hard to salvage our friendship and she went behind my back and slept with the very guy I thought I would spend the rest of my life with! I drove back in time to see her get in the passenger side of Robert’s mustang…

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